It’s true.
Remember my cousin in England?
Looks like he’s been having a good time since he got out of prison.
I have the most handsome son
Whenever I see someone trip because the sole of his shoe caught against the concrete, it makes me want to go up to him and say, “Hey. Looks like the traction on those shoes is a little too good, am I right?” Then I hand him a business card and tell him that I am a scientist who has invented a liquid that can break down shoe traction.
Later, at my house, my mom screams up to my room: “Hey! You have a phone call!”
But by then, I’m all depressed.
“Tell him to go away!” I scream. “There is no goddamned shoe traction liquid! There’s nothing! Nothing!”
(Source: gaws)
Taken with instagram
so flattered!
Like a douche.
It’s gonna be too hot for pants on saturday.
Just go naked, guys.
Generationals: “When They Fight, They Fight”
The best summer song knocked on my door today and I let it in.
Really sad news about Hulu.
Taken with instagram
Taken with instagram
went to westport and ate lunchables and drank beer on a car today
and almost caught a fish
Taken with instagram
